So much time spent in fear. Afraid to speak our minds. Afraid to tell others we love them. We’re so scared of rejection. I often think how much my life would be different if I had said the things I needed to say. I’ve been an outcast all of my life and the lifestyle stuck. What if I had thrown that to the wind and become an outgoing person? Would I be living where I dream of living? Would I have the career I’ve always wanted and more? Would I be married? Would my goals be completely different from what they are now? It all boils down to my fear of rejection. It keeps us from doing a lot of things. It would be nice to find the courage to take more risks. I let my mind drift and think of packing my bags and hopping on a bus to anywhere USA out of reach from everyone. I’d like to find the courage to go up to a stranger and start a conversation. I want to be that person who isn’t shaking with fear to speak in front f a crowd. I want to find that fearless side of me. It’s funny how most of us share the same insecurities yet are still afraid to acknowledge that there’s no need to be afraid of one another if we’re each dealing with these insecurities in some form. I can make promises that I’ll be without fear and my dreams lie to me and show me that it’s possible, but I know this is something that will always be apart of me. Little by little maybe I can be how I picture parallel universe me would act. More than that I hope to one day see that I am beautiful, worthy of love, worthy of all those dreams I reach for. I hope one day that everyone will see that they are unique and beautiful beings. We spend too much time in this life in our heads thinking that we are not magnificent. We indeed are. I’ll promise to find that in myself if you promise to find that in yourself. Deal?
-Asia Aneka Anderson