The Ramblings Inside My Creative Mind: You Might Be A Homophobe If...

        I’m not going to be nice in this post because I’m absolutely tired of the same repetitive bullshit when it comes to marginalized groups. In 2019 I refuse to keep going back and forth and back and forth with people when my underlying message to everyone is to let everyone live their best lives. Period. 
        So, whether you watched the Oscars or not. Whether you know who Billy Porter is or not (He’s on Pose, was on the last season of American Horror Story, and for me personally, I will always remember him from the movie The Broken Hearts Club) you know that Billy came to slay your whole life in an amazing tuxedo dress that was an homage to Hector Xtravaganza who is very well known in the ballroom community and recently passed in December. No matter your opinion on sexuality you have to admit that the dress was fierce. That’s what award shows are all about, the fashion.
           Something as simple as a dress on a man is causing so much controversy and as I see it, personally, especially in the black community. I don’t know why when a person of color decides to live loud and proud other black people scream out about a “gay agenda” or “wHat aM I SuPPoSeD tO TeLl mY kiDs?” or just throw out some random bible verse. Frankly, I sick of it. There’s no “agenda”. I’m 36 years old. Homosexuality wasn’t as talked about when I was a kid as it is now. We really only had a character on a few tv shows like “My So-Called Life” and a few others. Guess what? People still grew up to be gay. So how can someone being themselves make another person be something that they’re not? The only way another man is going to be gay is if he has a love of dick. He’s not going to do it as a fashion trend. I just don’t see how a community who wants so badly to unite and completely dismiss a whole group of people. You can’t say “We all need to come together…. Except for you gay folks. Keep that shit over there.” It’s beyond ridiculous. Some people could have children in their homes who may be LGBTQ+ and they’d never know because the child has heard them bash LGBTQ people so much that they live in fear of being unloved, kicked out, beaten, or worse. 
           People are really out here pressed about a few extra feet of cloth. You don’t want to wear a dress? Cool. Don’t wear one, but don’t state that if another man decides to that it’s the feminization of black men. A handful of people do not represent the masses. No one says that gangs like the Crips or Bloods make all black men look bad so how does a few famous gay black men make all black men look bad. We always talk about not letting someones bad behavior speak for us as a whole, but then we do shit like this. Why are we so uncomfortable with ANOTHER person’s sexuality that we actually kill them for it? Why are we so uncomfortable with ANOTHER person’s sexuality that we shun them for it? We take away homes, kids, and jobs for it. Someone help me understand. A black woman that is a lesbian doesn’t make me feel any less feminine. A black woman that is a lesbian doesn’t make me feel uncomfortable in a bathroom or locker room. I don’t feel the need to bash her when all she’s trying to do is work, go to school, get groceries, pay bills, provide for her family, and enjoy life the same way I am. 
         I wish that our community was a little more accepting of each other. Other communities have their issues. I know this, but it’s safe to say that our history is horrific, so why now in 2019 can’t we come together to tackle bigger issues like police brutality, the fucked up prison system, gentrification, etc. ALL of us need to come together. Not just straight black people. Not just black men. Not just black millenials. ALL OF US, gay, straight, light, dark, poor, rich, high school dropouts, college graduates, the elderly, the young, male, female, and in between? We need everyone. Why can’t everyone grasp that? If you set people in their little cliques nothing gets done. We do such a poor job or looking out for one another. If we’re not blaming gay poc for making us all look bad we’re blaming young black girls for getting raped because they’re “fast”, and if we’re not doing that, we’re blaming women for wearing makeup and being fake, if not that we call all black men deadbeat fathers, and so on and so on. When do we ACTUALLY start to stand up for each other? 
        In short, I don’t have time for the fuck shit. I support LGBTQ. I will not stand silent while people try to bash or harm anyone living their lives. I will also not deal with any other sexual and race based phobia. I don’t have time for the -ists either. racist, sexist, ableist, etc. The world would be a better place if y’all just knew how to leave people the fuck alone and mind your business. So worried about a man in a dress that you’re not even paying attention to the skeletons falling out of your own closet. 

-Asia Aneka Anderson, 2019©