So I was with my mom and grandma the other day and they were talking
about The View and that Rosie left then the topic of her kids comes up.
My grandma says something like “I don’t know why she would mix those
kids up in that.” Then she kind of trails off because she probably knows
I’m going to fucking come for her. I said “Mixed up in what, huh?” So
she says “Dating women.” I’m like “Wtf does that have to do with
anything? If they’re being raised in a healthy home then they’re not
‘mixed up’ in anything.” I’m so fucking tired of having this
conversation with her. It wasn’t necessary to even bring up. Wtf did
that even have to do with The View as a whole? How many times do your
granddaughters, one of which who happens to be a lesbian, have to
fucking educate you before you start to realize that people are people OR
to just shut the fuck up when you’re in the presence of one of us? Keep
that negative hateful shit to yourself. So then she brings up how she
doesn’t understand how people who are trans grow up and get married then
later go through a transition and “fuck their family up.” I told her “BECAUSE THEY GROW UP IN A SOCIETY OF HEARING PEOPLE LIKE YOU
AND FEEL ASHAMED AND KEEP WHO THEY REALLY ARE HIDDEN UNTIL THEY REALIZE
THAT THEY CAN’T KEEP BEING ASHAMED OF WHO THEY ARE ANYMORE!” Then
her and my mom bring up a mom who let’s her son dress the way he wants
and why can’t Bruce Jenner have done something like that. I said “Like
Angelina Jolie is doing with Shiloh? It’s called excellent parenting,
but Bruce grew up in a different time and most likely stuck to what
people considered normal.” Then they both went on to say that it was no
excuse and that everyone gets bullied and tried to compare someone being
bullied because they were overweight to someone who was transgendered
or gay and that it was no different. So I came back hard “PEOPLE GET KILLED OVER THAT! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!” Like I don’t understand their thought process AT ALL.
Then my mom chimes in that people dealing with weight issues do get
killed. Have you guys seen that news story because I sure haven’t. I
know kids get bullied because of the way they look and unfortunately may
commit suicide, but I see almost everyday about someone being beaten,
killed, or bullied to the point of suicide because of their sexual
orientation or gender. That was deflecting of the worse kind. Of course
they go to “Well we get killed because we’re black.” because they think I
won’t have a rebuttal. “YOU’RE RIGHT! WE GET KILLED OVER SOMETHING WE HAVE NO CONTROL OVER JUST LIKE THEY DO! AND WHAT?”
I was so beyond pissed by this point. Then my grandma brings up that
Chaz Bono transitioned into the man he always was and that “Her
girlfriend left her right after she did it.” I’m like grandma she may
have left for other reasons, but if it was because of that (I’m not sure
if it was. I’m not that invested) then obviously Chaz’s ex was a
lesbian and not bixsexual or anything like that and didn’t want to
proceed with a relationship with a man because Chaz is a man, ya know?
You really need to learn the difference between gender and sexual
orientation or at least know what you’re talking about before you
speak.”
Like I know some people think I may be harsh
because she’s my grandmother but I have dealt with her judgmental,
homophobic, racist, transphobic,and every other phobic bullshit for 32
years and I’m fucking tired. I’m tired of her calling people dealing
with mental illness “crazy” even though there have been and are several
people in our family that deal with mental illness (me being one of
them) whether she knows it or not. I’m tired of her calling black people
with natural hair “nappy headed” even though she’s been wearing a
fucking weave for God knows how long. I’m tired of her fat shaming
people like she’s model thin or some shit. Even today she dragged us to
her church (where their pastor has been caught with prostitutes on a few
occasions I might add. Gotta love them judgmental Christians, amirite?)
when it was over we weren’t even out of the parking lot before she was
pointing out some woman and saying she needed a girdle. I told her “A
person can wear whatever they want.” I’m tired of her talking to me like
I’m fucking stupid even though I have to explain EVERYTHING ON THE GODDAMNED PLANET
to her, but I’m the dumb one tho. She thinks I don’t know that she used
to call me “Melvin” behind my back. See, Melvin is a nephew of hers
that is slightly mentally retarded. So I got her fucking retard. She can
for real kiss my crazy retarded pansexual androgyne nappy headed fat
ass!
I’m seriously surprised I didn’t burst into
flames. I will say this: I know that for the past few years because I’ve
been battling depression I have been irritable and closed off and
sometimes a downer, but I have to give myself a pat on the back that,
despite having been raised around this type of shit all the time, I
became an accepting person. I have my moments where that side of my
family comes out of me and I may say something judgmental about someones
looks or something, but I try my best to catch myself. I wholeheartedly
believe that every person should be treated with respect. I don’t care
about who you sleep with, what color you are, your economic status, your
gender, or anything else. If you treat me with respect, I got nothing
but love for you. If you treat me like an asshole then I’m gonna show
you I’m a bigger asshole. People are people. That’s it. Why is that so
hard to understand?
-Asia Aneka Anderson 2015 (c)
Tumblr: AsiaWrites
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