Inside My Creative Mind

A Look Inside My Creative Mind: The Mom I Want to Be

In my latest video, I wanted to talk about the opposite that I did in my previous. I wanted to talk about the parent that I hope to be to my son. He will be here in a matter of hours at the moment and I can't wait to practice everything that I wish to and to be the gentle, encouraging, and loving parent I desire to be. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe.

A Look Inside My Creative Mind: Toxic Parenting

My latest video that I uploaded a few days ago is all about toxic parenting. With this video I didn't want to go too deep in depth about personal situations, at least for now, but becoming a parent myself it made me think of some of the things I had to deal with growing up as well as what I still deal with today. Some more videos on the topic may come up in the future, especially after I have my little one and get a taste of parenthood myself. Thank you all for tuning into my content. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe.

Mommy's Baby

I hesitated writing anything. In all honesty, I haven't had much of the motivation to write about this or anything, for that matter. We are now in the final countdown and you'll be with us soon, little man. Less than a month to go. People keep asking me if I'm excited or if I'm ready. I haven't had a way to answer that question. Since your dad and I have gone through two losses I'm just laser-focused on the finish line. Am I excited? Yes. Am I ready? I don't know, but I know that is a typical answer for first-time parents. I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to see you through ultrasounds, especially when you FINALLY decided to give a glimpse of your squishy little face. I still giggle when you move around. I just think it is the coolest thing in the world. You kick me and I poke you back and repeat. Just like your mom always wanting to get the last word already. Your dad and I can't wait for the next step in our journey and including you in it. You're the little boy we both wanted.

But baby boy, your mama is still scared. Halfway through you growing in my belly we were told that I had a condition that could be fatal for you if you tried to make a surprise early entrance. As much as I wanted you to be born on the grandfather's birthday, that you'll be named after, I still didn't want anything bad to happen to you or lose you. Again even though that has been a constant in the front of my mind I still find ways to block it out and stay focused on poking at you when you kick me and me laughing when you do it back. I sit right now in a hospital room that I have been sitting in for the past three weeks and hopefully will be here for another three more until I get to see your little face. Although I am bored and sometimes sad cause mommy is alone the end goal is all worth it for you, kid.

I want to make you all of the promises, but mommy is human. Mommy will make mistakes. I hope in those mistakes that mommy takes the time to correct herself and apologize to you. I hope, by me, you feel encouraged. It means nothing more to me to see you be a kid, gain your independence, to feel free, and to help you reach whatever goals you want and whatever makes you happy. I want you to have the opportunities I didn't in getting to be your natural self and be proud of you. I'm already so proud of you. You have made it this far, you are beating the odds, and you just keep striving. Mommy is so stinking proud of you and you aren't even here yet. I can't wait to teach you things, read to you, play games, teach you how to cook, help you with homework (except math. I'm so sorry, boo, but mommy can't help you with that one, but I got folks that can), and everything else under the sun. The sky is the limit for you and I hope that your dad and I can make it so. For you to have balance and stability means everything to me. You deserve that and more.

Baby boy there's a million more things that I can say to you, but, surprisingly, your mommy doesn't have all the words to express it. All I can do right now is enjoy these last few moments where we are right now and bond with you as you roll around in my tummy. I want to take in every single moment of this. It truly went too fast as I'm scared the rest of life will go. Can we both make a promise? Let's both promise that as time goes on and as we both grow older that we will often take time to hold on to moments and not let them pass us by. I hope that I am a good mommy to you and I am forever grateful that you decided to make me your mommy. Your dad and I truly believe that you were the baby that came to us twice before and that just maybe you weren't ready before. We're more than happy that you decided to come back to us and that you did it when you, and frankly, all of us were ready. Get ready to say hello to the world, little man, but please stay in just a little bit longer. The best things take time. We love you, wiggle worm.

A Look Inside My Creative Mind: Customer Service Nightmares pt 2

For the latest video that I have uploaded I continue with part two of my Customer Service nightmares video. In this video I am looking at the company aspect of customer service. The things where companies give both customers and employees the short of the stick and how they show how little they really care about both. I can see myself in the future making more videos in this series since I know that there are sooooo many of us who deal with the craziness that is customer service each and every day. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe.

A Look Inside My Creative Mind: Customer Service Nightmares

In my most recent video I could have, honestly, gone on and on. Customer service is a monster. It truly is. Anyone who works with the public, I think, deserves a medal. It takes so much patience that only other people who have been/ are there can understand. This is a little lengthy, but all of you who have dealt with customer service probably understand the struggle. This will most likely be a two-parter. In this video I discuss the difficulties with customers when it comes to these types of jobs. For my next one I want to talk about the company side and how employees are very underappreciated, as well as customers, honestly. It's not just the customers who make customer service jobs hell, it's also the people who run the show. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe.

A Look Inside My Creative Mind: I'm Published

In my latest video I introduce my first published piece that you can still find here. I'm still really super excited for my book and cannot wait until I can get my next one out there for you guys. I also want to break down other things going on in my life currently. So please, take a look, like, share, and subscribe. I appreciate all of your support.

I Did It! I'm Published!

Hello, everyone!

I finally have my first book published. It is a short story called Last Words. It was a story I wrote shortly after the death of my father in 2016. It's about a girl who is at the funeral of her father and wished that she had the opportunity to have just one last conversation with him. I think that is something that we can all relate to. There's never enough time with our loved ones and we never want to say goodbye in the first place, but when we do it would be comforting to get that one last talk. We hardly ever get that. Some of us are lucky to, but the majority are caught off guard and thrust into a life without that person and left with more questions than answers.

I will say that I honestly battled with wanting to publish this story. I thought, for the longest, maybe I'll start off this journey with publishing a poetry book, then on to my novels. I didn't shy away from it because of how close the story is to my heart. I shied away from it because I didn't think anyone would pay money for a short story that's only a few pages and with no major climax. Then recently, while I'm currently carrying my double rainbow baby, I started thinking of the relationship my child will miss out on with their grandfathers (both have passed). Then I thought about how rough these past few years have been. There's probably not a single person on this planet that has not been affected by Covid. Whether, you lost a relative, a friend, a coworker, a classmate, a mentor, etc. Covid has had an impact on us individually. Then I thought about the younger kids, who may have lost a parent, a sibling, or a grandparent. A story like this can help them, or anyone, walk through that grief process. It's a journey we all have to walk and to know that we never walk it alone and we all have similar feelings, even though we process grief differently, it makes it just that tiny bit easier.

I hope you pick up a copy and I hope it helps in some way if you are dealing with the loss of a loved one. Just know that person is there with you always. They are a part of you. My dad is a part of me. He always will be. He will be a part of my child. I know he is proud of me and he would enjoy this story very much. It was my way to say goodbye and my last hug to him. I miss him every sing day.

Thank you to everyone who has shown me so much love and support. You guys have been amazing and you've made me feel like a professional. You've made me feel like a writer is what I'm supposed to be. It's more than me just wanting this career and wanting this life you made me feel like I deserve it and that I speak to you on another level through my words. I try and more than anything I'm glad that I never stopped.

Last Words is available on E-book and in print. Just click the link and it will take you directly to the listing on Amazon. Again, thank you so so much